Connection is at the heart of our species, it’s what makes us human, it settles our nervous systems, it always comes back to the connection you have with your child, especially when times are tough. If connection is high, resistance will be low.

Nurture the relationship, show interest in what they’re interested in, light up when you see them.

Put guardrails on the bridge of life (boundaries, rules, norms and expectations), and hold those guardrails up in a respectful, compassionate and kind way.

See and hear your child, empathize to let them know you know what’s going on inside when they are flooded with emotions or disappointment; it’s ok that they’re mad, your job is to “stay low” and remind them of the love that you have for them.

Environment creates the mind, and then your mind creates the environment. How we were parented creates our narratives and they live in us. Until we are willing to shine light on that, we will continue to repeat the echoes of generations past. We have to grow ourselves to grow our children. Pay attention to your thoughts, perceptions and emotions.

Consequences, removal of privileges, use of reward systems - all foster an experience of disconnection at the core of the child, tends to execute the issue, and does not foster emotionally resilient children.